Mother’s Day is coming up quickly so here’s some slightly different ideas for the mama of multiples in your life!
Why not organise a lunch or dinner date for her with the other mums in her life? What about making it a multi-generational affair with her closest loved ones? Or does she have a group of close mum friends – why not organise a surprise for all of them together? It doesn’t have to be fancy, but trust us, this will earn some serious brownie points!
Do we need to say more?
Clean her car!
Inside and out, every inch. Oh yes, those car seats in the back need to come out and you have to commit to the task. Every. Single. Crumb.
Clean it, fill it up, check the tyres, make sure the first-aid kit is up to date. The shinier the better!
Bonus points if you take her for a nice drive once it’s done!
Wireless earphones / pods
Not a traditional one, but these serve a myriad of useful functions!
A relaxation tool – she can unwind and listen to her favourite music whenever she wants
A stress management tool – something to help lessen the noise of screaming toddlers or young children, using some low music or noise cancellation during the day
A mood booster – providing some upbeat vibes to get her through the day (even when the kids are sleeping!)
A functional tool – enabling her to talk to friends or family on the phone handsfree while she’s busy doing other things
A calming tool – winding down at the end of the night with a podcast or audio book in peace.
Small but mighty these ones!
Mother’s Day means mum’s turn at Yes Day! She has 24 hours to rule the roost, and whatever she says, goes.
Try starting the day with breakfast in bed, leave her a note with the rules, and wait for the games to begin!
Do you have a singleton plus multiples? Try organising a mummy + me activity just for the singleton in her life, to help her feel more connected with each of her children.
Or, what about organising a separate activity with each of her multiples? Sometimes juggling quality of time spent with each child can be hard, so why not make the time and space for her to reconnect with each of her kids on a one-on-one basis?
Take the mental load
Why not use this Mother’s Day as an opportunity to recognise and take some of the mental load from mum?
Make an effort to pick certain areas of the household function that you can take over for the next 12 months – bills, scheduling appointments, updating important personal documents or wills, or managing kids activities.
Accompany it with a heartfelt note or message about her role as a mum, all the work she does and how much you appreciate her, and you might just find this one captures her heart.
“Dress like mum” Dinner
This is a great one for older kids and even adult children. Do it at home, or go out somewhere nice. Everyone has to dress up and arrive to dinner in their favourite mum look.
This will guarantee some laughs!
Give from the heart
No matter what you get her, we can promise you that it’s the little moments and the smallest gestures that often mean the most. So take the time to make her feel special, no matter how simple, and she will adore it.
We hope this has given you some handy ideas and we can’t wait to see the moments shared with our multi mamas this Mother’s Day!
2020 has been, no doubt, a Christmas platter of challenges. A platter that’s been left out in the Aussie December heat for too long, perhaps. Despite all that has come before, and what still lies ahead, I hope that this holiday season gives all of our members the opportunity to relax just a little and reconnect with their loved ones, even from afar.
But every year, holiday season brings some unique challenges for those families with young multiples. For those that are lucky enough to spend time with extended family, there can be a massive juggling act involved (and that’s not just packing the car!).
Last Christmas, I had a 2 year old son, and my twin girls were 4 months old. Here’s some tips and tricks that might just help you conquer this holiday season with (most!) of your sanity intact. And for those with older multiples, I know these won’t all be relevant, but I hope they help you, even a little, with the holiday prep!
Be kind to yourself!
Whatever your approach is this year, whoever you see or don’t see, however much time you spend or don’t spend, remember to be kind to yourself. In the grand scheme of things, you might choose to maintain your routine over promising to attend multiple (pun intended!) events. And that is perfectly ok. After all, this is just one year of what will be many beautiful holiday seasons to come! If you need the space to spend with your little family, then be kind to yourself, and say no when you need to.
Traditions are great, but do what you can
There are so many beautiful traditions that families follow this time of year, and they have a very special place as children get older. But if your children are only little, try adapting them. Last year we left the girls with their Aunty and snuck out with our son to look at Christmas lights without them – it was great! He got one-on-one time with us, and we got to enjoy his little face without distractions. Stick with one or two really important things, grab a couple of cute photos if you can, and consider your job done! Remember, next year that tradition will still be there.
To host or not to host?
This is a tricky one. If you have the space, and you know your guests will respect it, hosting is great chance to keep young kids in their routine. Consider asking everyone to pitch in with the food, whack a few strings of tinsel on the table and bam! Then, you can make the most of an afternoon nap while everyone else enjoys cuddles with the bubbas. It might not be what you usually do, but perhaps this is the year to make a change, even if it’s only temporary. And if you’re travelling, consider taking a white noise machine (or download an app onto your phone) along with a monitor – it means you might be able to get some decent naps in for the kids, even away from the house & normal routine.
Find the magic in the little things
I used to get really upset that I didn’t have the time or energy to take loads of cute photos, or to dress the kids in lots of cute Christmas outfits. I used to compare the photos some of my other friends had and wonder “why can’t I do that?!”. But then, I remembered what made us special. We have multiples. Embrace the crazy. Grab a couple of pictures when you can and ask your friends and family to grab photos for you during the holidays, without you having to specifically ask. Make it a group effort, because raising multiples and capturing the special moments takes more than one (pun definitely intended)!
Pick one moment over the holiday season to breathe, to-refocus and to remember that life with multiples is a life multipled with love.
Wishing you and your family a wonderful holiday season. Don’t forget to share your photos with us on the members page or via our Facebook or Instagram @bmbanorthside
R U OK?Day is 10 September 2020. It is a national day of action to remind Australians that every day is the day to ask “Are you OK?”, if someone in your world is struggling with life’s ups and downs.
The message for R U OK?Day 2020 is “There’s more to say after R U OK?”. In what has been an incredibly challenging year on so many unprecedented levels, this year’s R U OK?Day will help Australians to reach out to their friends and loved ones and guide them through how they can start a conversation that could change, or save, a life.
If you know a multiple birth family, we encourage you to take a minute to ask them, R U OK? Multiple births are truly amazing, but they bring significant levels of stress and physical, emotional and financial turmoil. Parenting can be a tough gig, but juggling the responsibilities of a multiple birth can be overwhelming. A multiple birth starts out as a high-risk pregnancy. The challenges from then aren’t always high risk, but they are high stakes. There’s always more than one to worry about and the parents of multiples that you see are juggling that every minute, of every day.
Here’s some things that might be running through the mind of a multiple birth parent:
How will I afford this? How can I afford more than one baby?! How can I afford all the extra equipment?
They were born so early. They need so much help. I couldn’t even hold them when they were born, it broke my heart. How can I ever make up for that?
Everyone says I need to breastfeed. How can I feed them at the same time? Why isn’t this working? Should I express? How will I find the time to express, they need so much attention. I’m so tired, I can’t think straight. I cry all the time.
I can’t get out of the house. It’s too hard. There’s no point in me trying to keep friendships, I can’t even get out of the house to see them. My friends don’t understand.
My partner is struggling so badly at the moment. I don’t know how to help. I’m hurting too, but they have so much to deal with.
I can’t function at work properly, I’m so tired. I’m so scared I’m going to make a mistake, but I don’t know how to ask for help. What happens if I get fired because I’m not performing well enough? I love my kids, but I need some sleep.
Am I giving enough attention to each of them? How do they know I love them equally?
I can’t go to that event. I have 2 (or 3 or more!) toddlers, it is physically impossible for me to look after them in public by myself, I’m so scared they will run away and there’s only one of me to chase them. No one understands how stressful this is.
What’s the best way to help them through school, do we put them in the same class? What if one is doing better than the other? They keep getting compared?
How do I afford to keep doing all their favourite activities – they like different things, I can’t afford this. How else can I help them?
Their development is behind. We have so many appointments we’re just trying to keep on top of, to make sure they don’t get left behind. They are starting to realise they are different, how do I help them through this?
How do I encourage them to develop their own identity as they get older? I want them to be friends? Why don’t they like each other? Is it something I’ve done?
Why is this SO HARD?
Makes you think, right?
So what can you do to help?
Start the conversation. Listen with an open mind. Encourage action. Check in.
R U OK? Day has some amazing resources available to help you start the conversation with your loved one, and to go beyond asking R U OK? Because, after all, there’s more to say after R U OK?
Check out their website for some great tips, and let’s start talking.